A couple of days ago I posted about going to a detox unit to share my experience, strength and hope. I talked about how gratifying the experience was and how satisfied I was when I left there. I remembered what it was like sitting in those seats oh so many times myself and how I never utilized the life saving information that the members of H&I were so freely sharing. I remember it like it was yesterday when I was there sharing and I even felt a little saddened about how long it took for me to get this message.The sad feeling was very short lived. I am learning to love myself today and not dwell in the mistakes of my past. The truth is I just was not ready. I was in denial of my addiction and would not have made it here any sooner. I know today that I cannot allow the pain and misery of my past to dictate my actions today. I can only live for the moment.
So in living for the moment, I was thinking about different things that I want to do with my life in this moment. After going into the detox it got me to thinking that this would be the perfect thing for me to do right now. I would like to find out more about doing service in Hospitals & Institutions. I expressed this thought with my sponsor, my woman and some of my network who encouraged me to go for it. They reinforced what I was already feeling, that this would be the perfect opportunity for me to give back and help carry the message. To be able to share recovery with those who are not able to make meetings. It will also benefit me and help in my recovery process. It will help me to continue to grow and become more responsible. After all I cannot keep it unless I give it away.
So with all that being said I decided to take action. I went to the H&I Subcommittee meeting today and observed the atmosphere. I spoke to some people who knew that I wanted to get involved before and told them that I was ready. I was introduced to the coordinator and got some more information. I was able to make a decision and I am now a member of the training track for H&I. I am extremely excited about doing service on this level. I feel like this will be a good fit for me and look forward to learning the procedures and policies of Hospitals & Institutions. I look forward to having this commitment and doing it to the best of my ability. This is a step up from doing service on the group level which I have done since becoming a member of the fellowship.
Growth involves change and this is just another step in the ladder towards that change. That means stepping out of my comfort zone. I am grateful for the opportunity to be able to do service for a program that has changed my life for the better.