Good evening everyone. I apologize for being M. I. A. I have been feeling very depressed lately. I am suffering from the I’m not making any progress blues. The thing is that I am making progress. Being that I can be my biggest cheerleader and my harshest critic at the same time. It can be tough sometimes for me to see the glass as half full.
The truth is that I am grateful to even have a glass at all.,because as many of you know I suffered from a major stroke back in February last year and was on the floor in my home alone for 3days until I was found. I place very high expectations for my recovery and I am not fulfilling those expectations. I want to be well again but I am struggling with putting in the extra effort to do my exercises at home.
Of course I cannot forget to mention that the voice of addiction always has something to say. Constantly plugging away at me. My self esteem has dropped to active addiction levels. I have had to seek professional help. Mental health is serious businesses and should not be taken lightly. I am grateful to have a large network. I am also grateful to have a fantastic wife. She is the best and the strongest woman I know next to my Mom who I miss so very much. I didn’t really get to grieve or process her death because she passed a couple of weeks after the stroke. I hear her voice in my head at times. Thank God for the wisdom that she has imparted in me. She will always live in my heart. She may not be here physically but I know that she is with me spiritually. I know that this is just a temporary situation. My depression is gradually getting better. I go out for walks when I can. I’m determined. The devil is a liar. He cannot steal my hope. I won’t allow him to. If you or someone you know is struggling with similar issues. Please remember to never give up. I always tell myself that things aren’t the best but they aren’t that bad either, it could be worse. I find gratitude that they are not.
So with that being said. Until the next time. I pray that you are doing well and staying safe and healthy.
Peace and blessing.
Eric Ease 2020
From Struggle To Strength Inc.