Whenever I write I like to share both my experiences in active addiction and more importantly my experiences in recovery. I do that not only to help myself to always remember where I came from but to also allow others to see that recovery is possible. That it is real and it can and will happen if I choose to do the work necessary. I do not divulge the intricate plots and the devious schemes. Nor do I go into detail about the isolation, degradation and despair. I share just enough for you to get the picture and let your imagination do the rest.
Now I have to admit that most people’s imagination would probably be accurate because I have been through hell and high water, the valley of death and survived. I have lived a low life and have been blessed to live a better life today. I remember when I couldn’t see myself ever being able to escape the reality that was my life. It was my destiny I always thought and told myself. I will die an addict. I never thought I would live past 35, 40 tops. I sure as hell didn’t think I would ever see 50. Well I was wrong. Yesterday I have been blessed to see my 50th birthday and I have to say that it was an awesome experience.
I am thoroughly thankful and truly grateful for the experiences that have brought me to this point. I am no longer that bitter person with a death wish. I have grown into a responsible person and growing more responsible every day. 50 years is a milestone birthday and I was fortunate enough to be able to spend it with the woman I love. We spent my birthday in sunny Dominican Republic. It was a mind blowing, incredible experience that I won’t soon forget.
Not too long ago, I wouldn’t leave the block. I surely never thought I would ever leave the country. I couldn’t have done any of this with out God’s grace and mercy. I have been spared and allowed a do over.
Damn it, I’m going to do it right.
I have the opportunity to share my world and It’s a honor and a privilege to do so. I know that I cannot keep it, unless I give it away. Thank you for being on this journey with me.