All my life I wanted to be someone else, somewhere else, doing something else. Ever since I was a child I did not like who I was. I did not like my circumstances. I was too young to even know who I was, but I had it ingrained in my thoughts that I wasn’t good enough.

Those thoughts were not planted there by my parents either. Those were my own thoughts. Brought on by looking outside myself for acceptance. Brought on by judging my insides by other people’s outside appearances. Brought on by jealousy, envy, insecurities, low self worth and low self esteem.

Those thoughts and feelings led me to seek love and acceptance in all the wrong places. They fueled my desire to belong. To fit in with anyone that would accept me. Those thoughts and feelings betrayed me from the very beginning and continued to cloud my judgement for years.

I was a lost soul searching for an out. Creating false identities and living lies for so long. I became a casualty of my own low self worth and self hatred. Being that I never gave my true self a chance to develop. I wandered around in search of an identity that I thought people would like. People pleasing and acting against my will to fit in became my way of life.

Now 40+ years later I am beginning to unearth the truth. I am learning how to get in touch with who I am. Finding out my likes and dislikes. Cutting through a fog that is spread so thick that I am only scratching the surface. I can see that there are thousands of layers that I have yet to discover and uncover.

I am beginning to see myself as I truly am. Not as others would have me to be. I have acceptance of my circumstances, situations, abilities and of my defects, flaws and mistakes. I understand that today is the only day I need to focus on. Tomorrow I will practice acceptance all over again.

I fall short  with acceptance on occasions and that’s ok. This is my process and it takes time.

I accept myself for who I am today.
I accept myself for who I can become tomorrow.

Peace and Blessings

Eric Ease

4 thoughts on “SELF ACCEPTANCE

  1. Yes! Such an encouragement to read. I really relate to this Ease. I have spent my life molding into whatever would make the other person happy that I had no idea who I really was. It’s been only about a year from that realization point and my new journey of self discovery. It is such a new experience and I have found those people that were so used to having me form to their opinions are not supportive of the new changes I have been making- the ones I really want to make! Such a new concept- and not the natural thing to do but it feels like the right thing to do- find me and embrace me. Anyway, I’m rambling here but I was excited to read this and yet again really connect to what you are sharing. Thank you so very much for opening your heart and your life to us Eric. I appreciate you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • You’re welcome. I find that there are a lot of people who are not happy or supportive of my new life to. Thats too bad for them because today I realize that some of them are yhe weights that have been holding me down. Sometimes I have to let go in order to grow and that their season in my life has run it’s course. Real friends (and family too) should be with me and encouraging. Those who are not are no longer welcome. I will not kiss people’s ass in order to fit in any longer. So I am learning how to let them go. I have to so I can continue to grow. Thank you Souldiergirl for your kindness, support and encouragement. I truly appreciate your feedback. Have a great day. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • This is great wisdom and I am going to save it. Thank you so much for sharing. It’s so hard to let go sometimes but you are completely right- we have to let go of the weights. There’s this quote I like “in order to fly you have to let go of the shit that’s weighing you down” i don’t want to kiss people’s ass anymore either- I want to be surrounded by those who love and do not judge- those who love me for me and not what I can do for them. There finally came a time for me that in order to have healing and growth I had and have to take care of myself first. If I live for everyone else I become empty and still remain alone. You inspire me and help me. Thank you Eric Ease!!

        Liked by 1 person

        • You’re welcome Souldiergirl I am grateful that I am able to help through my blog. I am thankful that I have been spared the life I have once lived and am able to help others by sharing my experiences. It truly means a lot to me because that was not the purpose for me starting it in the first place but has turned out to be a blessing. I have found my place and my purpose through this blog and recovery and with the support and encouragement of people like yourself who understand and can relate. Thank you for your continued support and friendship. WE can and do recover. Have a blessed day. 🙂


Leave a Reply to Souldiergirl Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s