I am only as sick, as my secrets.
When I first heard this I didn’t understand it. I said my secrets aren’t sick. I didn’t get what they were trying to say and I didn’t want to appear stupid by asking someone what it meant.
After being in recovery for a little while I began to understand that there are no stupid questions. I had to put aside my
mentality and start asking questions.
So I asked someone and they helped me to understand that I cannot get the help I need if I am holding on to those secrets that have held me hostage for years. That harboring past hurts, resentments and anger I am actually blocking myself from growing. I cannot make room for new blessings when I am still cluttered with things from my past that 1. I have no control over and 2. They are over and done with. Nobody even remembers but me.
I have learned that sharing about my past helps me to let it go, move past it and grow from the experience. Instead of holding on to it and remaining stuck, sick and suffering. I have also learned that not everything I have been through is sharing material. Some of the things I should share in a more personal setting. Like with my sponsor or another trusted person.
The bottom line is.
I have to expose and disclose. Letting go isn’t easy. It takes time and trust. It took me quite a while to be completely comfortable sharing and still today I haven’t shared some things. I know that in time I will but I am in a race with no one.
We each recover at our own pace.
Peace and Blessings