Well I have to be honest. Quitting smoking has proven to be a bit more difficult than I thought it would be.
First let me give you a little background. I’ve smoked cigarettes practically all of my life. I started by picking up the butts out the ashtrays and then graduated to stealing them out the pack. My desire to fit in eventually turned into a full blown habit by then the addiction to nicotine had it talons dug firmly into me.
I continued to smoke for years without giving it a second thought. I didn’t realize that I was addicted until I was locked up and couldn’t smoke in receiving. I remember feeling like I was going to go nuts. Even after getting through that situation I continued to smoke.
My addictive behaviors manifest themselves in many areas of my life that have absolutely nothing to do with using drugs. I am addicted to anything that I perceive to give me pleasure. I know that today and I always looked at smoking as pleasurable..UNTIL NOW!
I know that all the urges and the irritable feelings will pass, but that doesn’t stop them from coming and at times consuming my every thought. I am grateful to my support network for being there for me. Without them I would be a loose cannon. Lol.
So I smoked 1 cigarette since February 1st after years of smoking just about a pack a day and sometimes more. Am I justifying smoking that 1.
YES I AM.
THIS TOO SHALL PASS.
Peace and Blessings