I no longer wish for things like I used to. I remember wishing I was rich. Lol wishing I didn’t have to work for a living. Wishing I could just disappear.
I lived in a fantasy world. I had this misconception that the world owed me something. That I got dealt a bad hand and people should feel sorry for me. That I deserved to be given freely what you worked so hard for. I truly believed that I was owed something for my suffering.
I told you before that my thinking was upside down. You see those same voices that told me all that bullshit was the same voices that almost got me killed. The same voices that kept me suffering from active addiction. The same voices that caused me to alienate myself from my family and friends. The same voices that I eventually started to believe. Those same voices told me YOU OWE ME! And had me actually believing it.
I looked high and low for handouts. I wanted the world but wasn’t willing to put forth the effort to obtain it. I asked, begged, borrowed and stole for a living.
Today I work for what I want. I have a higher power in my life and I no longer rely on others to do for me. I no longer look for hand outs, for a free ride. I come to believe that anything worth having if I want it, I will work towards it and get it. HONESTLY. I’m not asking you for nothing, I will not steal it, borrow it or hold it. I no longer act like the world owes me anything because in all honesty don’t nobody owe me a damn thing. I owe it to myself to become responsible for myself. No one else is responsible for me but me.