I pray that by the time you read this, that all is going great in your life. If it is not. Hold on and have faith that things WILL get better. This too shall pass.
I always start and end my day with a prayer. I have no doubts that there is a God because he has shown me proof every day. I am grateful and thankful and therfore I let him know it. I also show my gratitude by practicing living his will and not my own. I dont know exactly what his will for me is..But I know what it is not. It is not his will for me to live like I was. Using drugs, being dishonest, stealing and everything else that I was doing 11 months and 20 days ago. And for a major part of the last 38 plus years.
Today I am practicing a way of life that is all brand new. I have come to realize that the way I was living and the things I was taught and believed were all lies.
Shocking is a understatement. I didnt want to believe that I could ever be wrong. Not me. Not Mr. Know it all. Lol. But its true and I believe it because as I make changes to the way I live. I see the results. I have proof. I am no longer in denial that this program, The program of Narcotics Anonymous works. I was finally able to surrender my way and put trust in God and this process and I have made tremendous progress.
I could never have done this ony own and I only take credit for making the efforts. My higher power led me here and keeps me here and the people of the fellowship help me to stay here. Remembering the pain keeps me focused and ready to continue to do the work necessary. Giving it away helps to keep my addiction up front and it helps me heal because I am helping others. Reading the literature, sharing with my sponsor and my network and continuous meeting attendance plus doing stepwork has helped me make this journey so far and I will continue to follow the suggested guidelines of Narcotics Anonymous so I can maintain it.
I am proud of my progress and I don’t compare my recovery with anyone else’s. I am right where I need to be and it can only get better. Just For Today I have 355 days clean. 10 days away from my first year. Thank you all for being on this journey with me.