I thank God for his guidance and for bringing me to a place of gratitude. I am truly grateful for all he has done for me, is doing for me and will do for me.
I can say with all honesty that the lights have FINALLY switched on. I am finally getting it through my thick scull that drugs don’t work. That I can actually live life without the use of drugs.
For along time I struggled with not using. I’ve tried countless way to adjust or do it another way. Everything I tried failed It always led to destruction, dereliction and despair. No matter what I tried. How many lies I told myself the end results were always the same. Ive come to the realization after many unsuccessful attempts that I cannot win. That there is only one way drugs take me and that is down.
I have finally surrendered. I always thought surrender was for suckers and that I would never give up. But drugs have thoroughly whipped my ass. They have brought nothing but pain and misery and I am done.
Just for today, If you don’t pick up you cant get high and the rest of the slogans finally make sense. They use to just fly over my head. I was unable to grasp the simplicity of it until now. I am learning to take it easy and not over think things. Im tired of complicating the process when it is so simple.
Today I can accept suggestions and follow directions. I am open minded and willing to do whatever it takes not to return to the degradation and despair which was my life for so long. Thank God for the fellowship and all the people who support and inspire me.
Thank God the light FINALLY SWITCHED ON.
Thanks for allowing me to share.
Grateful recovering addict
Eric Ease 105 days clean.