Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

I am grateful that they have marathon meetings on Thanksgiving because I had nowhere else to go.

I am forced to take a long hard look at myself and the life I’ve lived. I have caused more harm than good. I have been selfish and self centered the majority of my life. I am forced to sit here alone and deal with the feelings of loneliness. I am saddened at the outcome that is my life.

Although the above statement is true I know that its not too late to turn things around. I have been given a second chance at life. I have taken this opportunity for granted many times because I still wanted to do things my way and would not surrender to the fact that my life is unmanageable. I still held the belief that I could control the outcomes and manipulate situations to my benefit.  Its that thinking that has led me time and time again to using.

I thank the God of my understanding for another chance to change and I am taking it seriously.  I know that I am not in control. I know that doing things my way leads to disaster. I know that I cannot do this alone. I know that I have to do the work and learn to take suggestions as just that a suggestion.  I know that people are not trying to hurt me when they make suggestions. I know that I have to take a leap of faith and trust the people who have been there and done that. I know its not all about me and that I need to get involved because I am only going to get out of recovery what I put into it.

I finally feel like I am ready to do what is necessary to maintain and progress in this process. I know that its not a race and this is my process and it will happen in God’s time not my own and I am willing to take it one day at a time.

This has been and will continue to be a learning experience. I feel excited and I have faith that as long as I follow this way I have nothing to fear.

My actions will speak for me.

Peace and Blessings


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