Good morning family. I thank God for waking me today. I am grateful that I am back with my new found associates in the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous.
I had a great weekend. I made meetings, I prayed for guidance and read the literature, did some writing, called my sponsor and other recovering addicts and followed the suggestions. I shared about my relapse and fellowshiped with others afterwards.
I was able to listen to others and not interrupt. I took a look at what applied and am allowing myself to accept my past and will work hard at letting it stay there. I was welcomed back with hugs and encouragement this week and for that I am truly grateful.
I was so worried about how others would view me and the criticism I would receive that I lost focus of the main reason to come home. I cannot save my face and my ass at the same time. I am responsible for my recovery no one else. Criticism and others opinions I have no control over.
I have to remind myself that this is my process and I will recover at my own pace. This is my beginning and I am a new comer. I will remember that recovery doesn’t happen over night and I am not in a race so there is no need for me to compare my process with anyone else’s.
I will stay in the moment and stay out of the danger zone that is my thinking. This addict alone with his thoughts is a dangerous place to be. I will continue to talk about what I am feeling and not stuff those feelings and thoughts but share them and be open to the suggestions and feedback. I will not try to do this alone.
I will work the program to the best of my ability, follow the suggested guidelines of the NA fellowship, continue to pray for guidance and I believe all will be well.
Thank you for allowing me to share.
Peace and blessings.