…we accept responsibility for our problems and see that were equally responsible for our solutions.
Basic Text, p. 97
Just for today:
I accept responsibility for my life and my recovery.
Good morning and God Bless You.
Todays JFT is a reminder that I have a responsibility to take care of business that I once took for granted or put off on someone else to take care of. In my active addiction I didn’t care about being responsible all I wanted to do was use. From the basics like washing clothes to the necessary like paying bills it didn’t matter I didn’t care. I lost a lot due to my irresponsible behaviors again it didn’t matter, I didn’t care. I hurt people with my irresponsible behaviors, I hurt myself it didn’t matter, I didn’t care.
That was my life, if you want to call it a life. I prefer to call it my nightmare because today that’s what it looks like to me a nightmare. The only difference is I actually lived that nightmare it wasn’t just a dream. I wish it was but to deny it would be irresponsible. I do not dwell on it because its the past but the wreckage is still evident today so there is no way to sweep it under the rug anymore. It has to be dealt with.
The first thing that needs to be done is I have to keep showing up. It is mandatory that I make meetings. If I do not stay connected I can and will return to the madness and insanity. Being responsible means staying the course and learning how to live clean at the age of 46. Right now that’s my responsibility everything else has to come second. Staying clean is my priority. I am responsible for my recovery not my sponsors or the groups but mines.
As I practice living the principals it will become easier. As long as I give myself a break all will be well. I have faith and I truly believe that.
Peace and Blessings.