Many times in our recovery, the old bugaboos will haunt us. Life may again become meaningless, monotonous, and boring.
Basic Text, p. 78

Just for today:

Ill take a break from the routine and stretch my potential to its fullest.

Hello and God Bless You.

I have to admit that I am feeling really bored with my life right now. Although I am grateful that I am clean, my life seems to be missing something. The problem is I don’t know what it is I think I am missing. I can totally relate to the Just For Today I have been feeling like this off and on for the past couple of weeks. It has been suggested that I make a  gratitude list. I have done that. I shared about it and posted about it. But those feelings of emptiness and boredom still haunt me.

I have been trying to do new things. I am trying to do different things in hopes that the feelings will go away. I know that its just a feeling and it shall pass and it usually does but its been coming back more often. I know that its my disease checking in on me to see if I want to cash in my clean time. I have no desire to use and will not listen to or fall for the lies. Because that is all they are LIES.

I have been doing good and good things are happening in my life and just like clockwork my disease shows up to try and ruin it. Ever since I can remember everytime things are going good I get these negative feelings and thoughts. I begin to listen to the lies and before I know it I’ve destroyed whatever opportunity I was presented with. I am so grateful to God, the fellowship of NA, my sponsor and ny network because had it not been for all of the above and for the work I have been doing I would not have the growth to recognise how my disease it playing tricks on me. I would fall right into the trap and be right back out there using again.

Today I will concentrate on all the good things and remember that my life is not boring, It is great right now. Thanks to the grace of God. I will not fall for the lies which have ruined many opportunities in the past. I will reach out to others and continue to share my experiences in hopes that they will help others. 

Thank you for reading today’s blog post.

As always feel free to leave a comment below to let me know you were here.

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Peace and Blessings


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