I want to wish everyone a Happy and Healthy Thanksgiving. I plan on making a few meetings today because the holidays have always been a reason to use. I thank God for waking me up this morning. I pray for strength, courage and knowledge of his will so I can carry out and live his will and not mine.
I am at a marathon meeting and will stay here the majority of the day. Unfortunately I am not with my family today guilt, embarrassment and shame are keeping me away. I know that they think I’m probably using somewhere but that’s ok today. I am more worried about getting my life together right now.
Good meeting this first one was about egos. I shared about how my ego (Kazoo) keeps me thinking I am still some big time somebody and how that leads me to believe that I can do this by myself and I don’t need to be in the rooms. All bullshit.
I stayed at the marathon meeting for 6 hours. There was some terrific topics.
Relationships in Recovery
Honesty, Open mindedness and Willingness I really enjoyed all of the meetings got to eat some great food, talk to people, see friends I haven’t seen in awhile. I am so grateful that there is a place to go on the holidays.
This was the first Thanksgiving that I was clean in 30 years. I was scared I wouldn’t be able to maintain but thanks to God, NA and the people in the fellowship I can say today I am clean 6 days. I am truly grateful and thankful.
Tomorrow is my home groups 27 year anniversary. I am glad to be able to do service for my home group. I am going to help set up and help serve food. I am happy to give back what was so freely given to me. I love my higher power God and my home group.
I thank God for guiding me, giving me the strength and courage to make it through the holiday and for getting me home safe and clean. Have a great night. Until tomorrow peace.
JUST FOR TODAY…I DON’T GET HIGH, I IDENTIFY.