ENOUGH IS ENOUGH


IM GETTING TIRED OF THIS. IT IS TIME FOR CHANGE. I CANNOT KEEP GOING ON THIS WAY. I HAVE TO GET SERIOUS ABOUT GETTING CLEAN. I HAD A TERRIBLE TIME AS USUAL AFTER I STARTED GETTING HIGH. PARANOIA IS A MOTHER FUCKER. SITTING THERE LISTENING FOR SOME INVISIBLE GHOST TO COME AND FEELING STUPID THE WHOLE TIME.
NOW I’M AWAKE TRYING TO GET MYSELF READY FOR ANOTHER DAY, FEELINGS OF GUILT, ANGER, PITY, FOOLISH, LONELINESS AND REGRET FILL MY HEAD. I’M WONDERING HOW THE HELL DO I KEEP ENDING UP IN THIS SAME SITUATION TIME AND TIME AGAIN. I CAN’T FUNCTION I CAN’T STAND TO LOOK AT MYSELF SOMETIMES. I JUST WANT THE NIGHTMARE WHICH IS MY CURRENT LIFE TO END.
I KNOW WHAT I HAVE TO DO. TIME TO PUT IN THE WORK. IT’S BEEN SAID THAT MEETING MAKERS MAKE IT, SO I’M READY TO GIVE IT ANOTHER TRY. ANYTHING IS BETTER THAN THIS. SO I’M GOING TO START TODAY TO MAKE A MORE CONSCIOUS EFFORT TO REMAIN CLEAN AND SOBER. STARTING TO DAY I WILL START TO PUT IN THE WORK THAT IS NECESSARY TO MAINTAIN A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE. I WILL READ THE LITERATURE WORK THE STEPS  AND PRACTICE TAKING IT EASY ONE DAY AT A TIME. I HAVE TO, THIS IS MY LIFE AND I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR IT.
I WILL KEEP YOU INFORMED OF MY PROGRESS AS THE DAY GOES ON, BECAUSE I KNOW ME I FEEL THIS WAY NOW AND LATER THE OBSESSION WILL KICK IN AND I WILL BE FEELING ANOTHER WAY. I MUST REMAIN STRONG SO I PRAY TO GOD FOR HIS GUIDANCE AND KNOWLEDGE OF HIS WILL FOR ME AND THE POWER TO CARRY IT OUT.

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